I wanna just have a big flashback episode to myself and how my life and relationships mean something to me. How they got me to be me in the end and how childhood just ends and we all have to be adults. Adults that make hard choices but make it through to be responsible for not all but some people can do it. I am reminded because I did break down a relationship because of how much anger my little brother has for my mother and how much she has damaged him and me. Sure, he didn’t mean to be mad but in the end, I didn’t mean to hurt anyone and he knows I have always got his back and I hope he knows that even now. I spent most of my childhood taking care of him and while my mother didn’t mean to do that to me but because she divorced my abusive father, she had no choice. Of course she wasn’t always loving in fact, she’s problematic and toxic but I did the best I could as a child raising another child 11 years younger than me but I remember bringing him home in Jan of 1999 and holding my dearest baby brother. I had asked for a baby sister but a baby brother is fine with me now. I have accepted it after all these years but in the end, he’s always been close to me and despite our ages differences of 11 years, we get along pretty well.
Now, he’s leaving in August, my birthday month and while I turn 28, I’ll miss my little brother dearly and though the thoughts of joining any branch of the military scares me, I know he will be fine. I am just worried about our current administration and their direction, and since he’s leaving for the Marines, I get paralyzed with fear. I don’t wanna lose my little brother. He’s been the proof of good things happening in my life and besides, I wanted his name to be Joshua but I am glad he’s a Christopher or Michael as we call him by his middle name. Sure, he has flaws but then we all do and besides, I stand by him now and forever, bad or good decisions.
My dog mom Mina is taking care of her son’s dogs for awhile and I managed to get a group photo of them smiling together. They aren’t so bad to handle and they listen which is great to say the least.