It’s been awhile since my last update and honestly? Things have been bad, terrible then good for most of the time. I mentioned that I’m getting bariatric surgery but it’s been pushed back to July (don’t know the date but I’ll be out of work for two weeks, so there’s that) due to that winter storm in February, so, I have three more meetings with the surgeon…so yeah, for me? I’m anxious to the point that it’s bringing back my depression and whatnot. It’s hurting me a lot but I’m going to see a therapist again (wish me luck!) again this Monday at 5pm, though work is great despite us losing our front end department head and me realizing that I’m still a bad judge of character and I only want to think that people are all good when they aren’t, all the time.

I did manage to get further into Jojo’s Bizarre adventure and met friends there as my real life friends are often busy with real life and have careers…I admit that it gets lonely and whatnot…without my real life friends but they never truly accepted or cared about me, in the end, I had to let go of a toxic best friend, only because they were extremely needy and clingy to me and kept harassing me about their drama that made no sense for me to care about. Now, I see what kind of person they are but it’s sad that I don’t have the greatest track record of judging people’s characters correctly. It’s part of the learning process, I think? Maybe so.

Noriaki Kakyoin from Jojo’s bizarre adventure part 3 plush
I was told that I could try having children about 16-18 months after the surgery, so that’s gotten my hopes up a lot but I have to do a lot of work for this to go on in order to be suitable for being a parent, a mother which is difficult due to my various mental illnesses.

Also, my hair is growing out and next month, I plan to get it permed or something? I haven’t figured it out but I want to do more for my hair than anything…it’s so beautiful now! I love it so much~! Ahhhhhhhh!!!!

Me

April 24, 2021 by Michelle 0