Apparently, despite my best efforts to try, I always end up sabotaging myself, and it hurts because there is still some part that does wanna succeed but like before, I am afraid. Fear always does that to a person and I, too. I hate the fact that I’m allowing fear, the worst kind, hurt and hinder me from growing as a person should and be a functional human being; So I’ve decided to send out for SSI, which is Supplement Income for those that cannot work and I am filing for myself, since I don’t work and we need the extra income. I’ve been terrible with impulsiveness, and have hurt my husband yet again, but like before, I am still trying-trying my hardest to continue being what I should be honest with myself and my husband. I need to be in order mature in our relationship and it will be 5 years on March 9th, and I cannot believe that it’s been that long, too! On the plus side, we’ve been together for 11 years and wowzers, how time flies and while there were some tribulations and sorrow, we’ve managed to make it through despite my mother in law’s doubts and cruel words.
- My younger brother came back down and he visited me! He’s going back to South Caroline for 3 months for more training and then back here for good, though he has to check in with the Marines every month or so, I am so happy that he came to see me! I didn’t see him at Christmas due to the sleet but this time, he surprised me by calling me and asking to come over, of course, I was overjoyed. Over stimulated.
- Finally had my favorite food in the whole world!